How I got here...continued

So, I graduated from DC in 1987 and moved out west to San Diego, CA and began college at Point Loma Nazarene College. Awesome! Beach front property, probably the ONLY time in my life I will have an ocean view from my bedroom. I loved school, and had quite a few friends. I gained the obligatory "Freshman 15" but was active with my classes and a part-time job as a nanny for two little girls. A dear friend of mine my sophomore year wanted to join Weight Watchers, and needed some moral support. I thought it would be fun, and I could stand to lose a few pounds I was sure.

Well, the first Weight Watchers weigh in...the scale showed a number that I was NOWHERE ready for! I thought for sure the "50" pound weight would still be in the 150 pound spot where it had been when I was in high school. The 50 pound weight had to move, but it was up to the 200 pound spot. 219 pounds. I was devastated. Seeing that number, that high motivated me to take the Weight Watchers program seriously, and I worked hard! I lost 60 pounds in 6-8 months and felt great. I managed to keep that weight off for quite a few years. I graduated from Point Loma, got a teaching credential, moved to Hemet to teach high school English, moved back to San Diego to teach for a few years, then got a job at Subway Sandwiches' corporate office where I met 'HIM!'

"He" was a sweet, quiet, fun-loving guy. He loved Disney movies and Disneyland as much as I did. He liked sports and had a lot of friends. He was perfect. We dated for a few years and got married in 1999. After we got married, I noticed that I had put on the weight I had lost in college, and more. I felt fat, ugly and depressed.

I think I was pretty much on a diet for the next 4 years...always on and off, watching what I ate, trying to exercise, and pretty much miserable. After a miscarriage in January of 2002, I knew that I would not have a successful pregnancy if I didn't lose some weight...so I tried in earnest to lose some of it. We discovered we were pregnant again on October 31, 2002. My first doctor's appointment, I remember seeing the digital scale show "258" and I was stunned. I knew I'd "let myself go" but THAT MUCH?! I gained 30 pounds during the pregnancy and was pregnant from "my chin to my knees." I was HUGE!! I knew I was big...but when I saw "Morbidly Obese" written on the top of my chart one day, I was really, truly devastated. I realized that when people described me, they referred to me as "the heavy-set gal." And it hurt because that would be an accurate description.

I'm kind of feeling worn out...and think it's wise for me to step back from this little, or more accurately BIG trip down memory lane. I'll come back and give the last 6 years a shot later.